The Elevator Chronicles: Out of Order!

Good Evening All,

I tell you I've had this feeling all along right and I won't name which friend, but she who will remain nameless and has been telling me I'm so paranoid she will not entertain listening to me anymore better read this! I called it earlier today, and received this email just a few minutes ago. Not wanting to hide anything from my loyal readers, here's exactly what I received....

"Hi- I wanted to thank you again for bringing in the delicious lunch today. You have a real talent in the culinary arts and I'm so happy to shared your talent with me.

I also wanted to tell you about something that has been weighing heavy on my heart today. As you know, I have been having a very difficult time with my family situation. The last couple of days and especially the last week or so have made things very difficult for me...especially as I near the point where things are "final" with a significant event which will have a serious impact on my family and my kids. As you know, I've been talking with someone about how to manage through this difficult time. I talked with him this morning and he strongly advised me not to begin dating or get involved with someone during this time, and especially not until any divorce is well under way or final. That may or may not be your intent but I feel that both of us have thought about that. That said, I feel I need to be smart and not begin dating or further developing our relationship. You are an amazing and intelligent person but I do not want to move forward or mislead you. It has been a pleasure getting a chance to know you, and I hope you understand that this is not the right time for me to engage in a new relationship.

Sincerely,

Elevator"

Ok so did I call that or what? Now most of you may be saying hello I could have figured this out all along, and yes I had it figured out all along. I mean it's not like I had any intentions of marrying the infertile man who has to give 67% of his income to a wife who doesn't work while sleeping on an air mattress in an apartment that is barren outside of a Budweiser blimp, which doubles as a window shade. Nope that wasn't my intention at all, I did think a nice summer tryst would be fun but nonetheless this doesn't seem to be in order. SO I am resolving now two things, and hopefully someone will hold me to them as I'm not too good about it myself.

1. No more work involvements (although this one was a vice president so in that, I am kinda impressed with myself

2. NO more married/ divorced/ men with kids Good Lord the drama and baggage and alimony, and child support, and no assets is NOT that becoming. No offense to those who have endeavored here because with 50% of marriages ending in divorce it's virtually impossible not too. It's not that I wouldn't date someone who had been through this circumstance and was over it and had moved on, but clearly that is not who I have been wasting my time with.

Like I said, I did know this was going to happen, and had called it from the beginning. One would think my decent read on people would cause me to behave differently since I can generally always call the outcome. However- there's that troublesome part of me that just is drawn like a moth to light for a good challenge. I mean if I look at it that way, did I achieve my goal here? I suppose so, in that once again I plotted, constructed, and fulfilled another rather seemingly out there seduction. My sister says that I have commitment phobia and that's why I am drawn to clearly unavailable men? What do you think? I really need to get over this whole idea of if they're into me, I'm not into them because I suppose I could be not giving some decent people a chance.

So in the spirit of trying to behave (kinda) I sent en email to IT guy who I went out with last week. Remember the one I couldn't find anything wrong with? He actually called me last night so we shall see. Luckily outside of an email which I didn't respond to that excitedly from engineer I haven't heard much from him. I did start initial communication with another guy today who looks kind of interesting so we'll see what that yields.

And just for kicks folks and because I must ALWAYS have the last word. Here's what I wrote back to elevator. Partly because I need to have the last word, and partly because I was hoping it would elicit another response, I could use to entertain all of you. However, somehow I think his therapist made him promise to completely walk away so don't get your hopes up!

Until the next debacle. Sweet dreams, and naughty thoughts! :-)

Hi Elevator,

Thanks for your email. I appreciate your honesty. You know it's interesting because between talking to you yesterday in your office and today it seems like you definitely were emotionally 360 degrees from where you were yesterday. I think what your guy said it smart, and I know that this whole process is wrecking emotional havoc on you and your family, which has to be your priority. Knowing what you're going through my expectations were that you were definitely not in a place for a relationship, which I wouldn't intend to pursue with someone going through all that you are at this point, like your guy said. My intentions, as I enjoy talking to you and hanging out were to do just that, and have fun.

With that being said however, I do think that regardless of what my intentions were on Sat, you clearly intended for what happened afterwards to happen, and that's the only thing I have trouble with. I am pretty positive I mentioned at the casino that I am not comfortable with, nor have I ever had the experience of a one night stand so in that respect I kind of feel like not that ok with what happened the other night now. I guess I'm curious why you waited until after Saturday to send this note. I do kind of feel like you may have already known this but wanted to "test the waters" just to make sure? You do seem like too nice of a guy for that though so I do wonder. Anyway regardless of what happens next I do not wish for any awkward situation at work, and also have enjoyed getting to know you. I wish there was some type of happy medium that would allow both of us to feel more comfortable with not abandoning our core values. So there's my thoughts...if you have any additions ones I'd be happy to hear. I always think that though cliché, honesty is the best policy.

Take care,
KissedAllTheFrogs