Can I have your cherry? if not your socks..

Good Evening All,

I haven't seen any comments on the latest posts so please post comments! Anyway I'm fresh back from a bachelorette party in NYC this weekend where nothing but trouble occured. Inititally I hadn't even wanted to go- not so much a fan of the city, various modes of transportation to get there, all the noise, the craziness, the truly odd people and lifestyles that you just don't see living in the woods. Here however, you'll notice to your left the first real picture I've ever posted on this. I figured the legs of myself and the other attendees are anonymous enough. The doorman seemed to have some angular issues when asked to take our photo. Any guesses on which one I am?

This was the first bachelorette party I'd been to where to men were invited. The bride (a close high school friend) had invited one of her childhood friends as well a a male college friend, both of whom dressed in drag for the occasion. This was the first of the odd things I was exposed to.....The whole man in a mini skirt with a tuft of belly hair riding up the abdomen, exposed by a belly shirt that said "blow". Enough said. Never mind the taxi we took after the ride from the hostesses apartment where we dined on classy and yummy delicacies such as the gummy penises, took us down to the Village. We weren't even out of the taxi and I was alarmed. After departing I noted the fact we were were walking with two men wearing woman's clothing and neon colored ladies wings (one with devil horns) and not one person seemed to be the least bit fazed by this.

Prior to entering the bar we were given my favorite of all bachelorette fun- the scavenger hunt. For those of you not privy to this often times naughty excuse to do things one might (not all) not normally do it's this list that generally the bride has to complete before the end of the night of she's subject to taking shots or whatever else the bridal party decides. However, this evening had a twist. All were to be involved in the scavenger hunt. Adorned with name tags that read "Aura Gasm" "Fook mee" and "Anita Man" we entered the bar and as my competitive nature shifted fully into gear while the other girls were ordering (and paying for their own $15 martinis) I launched into full pursuit.

Within a few minutes I had a few check marks on the list. I had gotten a guys number (and picture with him), gotten a guy to give me his condom, gotten marriage advice written on a napkin from another guy (he wrote one word- overrated), but I could not get anyone to give me their sock. Several guys who I asked to show me their underwear weren't wearing any, and soon I thought why not get the bride into the action. She was laying low at the tables with the others so I grabbed her and said you need to check something off already how about asking that guy in the red to dance for you which was one of the requisite items on the list. He looked like he'd be up for it, I thought bewildered at his skin tight red undershirt not noticing at the time his hand was on the shoulder of another guy. Oh they were up for it and more.

They insisted on coming over to our table and put her in a chair and started gyrating one in front and one in the back around her. This was a sight only the city would provide. At least she got a chechmark! Onto the club things started really getting interesting. I spotted a sailor fresh of the boat, pictures were taken, music started getting good. Complimentary shots of vodka were being passed out, and then I spotted them. A group of 5 or so hot guys on the other side of the bar. Time to stake out some more checkmarks. After begging for a sock from this group (you'd be surprised how several shots and a goal of winning brings out a not very dormant uninhibited side) I said well if you're not going to give me a sock you had better do something. The guys took my list and noticed the line that said reach over the bar and steal a guys cherry and tell him thanks for my cherry or something equally as lame. Well one of them- luckily one of the hotter ones reached across the bar and put the cherry between his teeth and said come and get it. Well you didn't need to tell my twice, I think we managed to jointly tie the stem in a knot with our tongues.

Excellent- this party had no officially gotten started. The bride was highly entertained by the posse of hot guys I brought over to join our fun and as the music got louder and the grinding got more feverish, more fun was had. The fact I needed/ wanted to catch a train home started to escape me. I clearly recall making out with someone else from the hot guy group before the end of the night. I can't for the life of me decide if it was cherry guy or one of his hot friends but really I can't say I'm losing any sleep over it. After finally realizing if we had any prayer of catching our train we would need to depart, goodbyes were said to the hot guys and a 55 block taxi ride ensued. With only 2 minutes to spare, one of the other party girls and I ran like the wind through the train station at the speed of lightening in our dresses and 4 inch heels lucky to make it just in time.

And this my friends is why I love still being single. No rules, many hot guys! Maybe NYC isn't as bad as I thought....

Neither far nor near, look in that mirror rear

Good Evening All,
Remember that younger man I was telling you all about. Just three years my junior, but still a bit strange to me. We actually went out Sunday night. After chatting by phone a few times, he said he wouldn't mind driving to come take me to dinner. Younger Man lives a state away and a good 2 hours plus, but would be at the other end of the state for the weekend visiting family so we agreed to meet. When I found out the place I initially wanted to go was closed I googled restaurants in the next town and came across one that looked like a regular nice Italian restaurant. I printed out two sets of directions and headed out to the commuter parking lot in that town to meet him, so he could follow me. My only concern was that the restaurant was nearby this large 55+ complex in the town, and I was hoping it wasn't somehow associated with that. However, the website didn't list any affiliation and I figured it would have mentioned if that was the case.

I got out of my jeep and saw younger man walking towards me. He was a cute kid, His hair was lighter than the pictures and at his ripe young age he still had all of it. Check mark one in place! I explained that I was hoping this place had nothing to do with this weird senior complex , which is almost like it's own town and he very politely offered to look it up on his navigation system. He told me I could follow him as it came right up.

Then the scavenger hunt began. We traveled about seven minutes through very residential areas until we came upon this little separate area that seriously doesn't even seem like it's part of the actual town we were in. Quite nice condos and homes adorned a whole neighborhood, complete with its own library, store, gardens etc. I only know this because we took quite the tour. Several times as he glances at me in his rear mirror and motioned to pull over we had seen signs for this place but no matter where we turned it was nowhere to be found. He even asked a man walking out of his condo where it was and he had no idea. Luckily his system and the number and unluckily even the people who worked at this place couldn't figure out how to explain it. As I continued to follow him I was extremely embarrassed this guy had driven over 60 miles to meet me in the next town only to find out I hadn't a clue where this place was I clearly selected at the last minute.

Finally after what was at least 25 minutes we came across another sign and then entered...a country club. I panicked as the restaurant had looked pretty standard on the web page. He was wearing shorts, and I a skirt, but still. Would we even be able to go in, or was it members only? As we are seating outside on a beautiful patio literally in the middle of a gorgeous gold course, the waitress hands us the menus and then I see entrees are around $30 each. I felt horrible. I have to say younger guy was extremely polite, well mannered and entirely unfazed by all of this craziness. There we were clearly junior to the rest of the patrons by 60 years or so sitting outside on this damp, but beautiful patio at this insanely pricey restaurant. Not to worry he told me I ordered a chicken dish that ran on the lower end of the prices and to the GA man's dismay a nice glass of red wine.

Unfortunately for all of you the humor in this date ended after the wild goose chase to find the place. Dinner was nice, relaxed, and conversation flowed. I didn't feel any kind of particular flirty connection but there was a lot of requisite first date details to get out, so no worried. If he calls again I'd go out again, and if not I wouldn't lose sleep over it. After all this was one fine meal, that after telling him about oral surgeon he promised he wouldn't ask to be reimbursed for.

In other updates Sunday afternoon I received an email from fratboy1 who has resurfaced again. He wanted to let me know he was closing on his new place on Monday and had been busy but hoped I'd been enjoying the weather, and that I had a great weekend. Not sure what his deal is but whatever. I congratulated him and moved on. Almost MBA and I chatted by phone a few times last week. Still no plans to meet but perhaps in the coming weeks. As saddened as I am to report no walk yet with elevator man. Looking at his calendar for work he's swamped with meetings usually lasting into the evenings every single night. I will be in the office tomorrow and hope to hear from him as I will surely keep everyone posted.

Night All!

Quirks versus Jerks

Good Evening All,

Hope everyone had a marvelous weekend. So the other day I was perusing my favorite place- the online ads for attractive, educated men with a full head of hair and I came across the profile of one who seemed to fit the profile. Only problem was he was from GA. No harm in chatting though as we began to IM. GA man was an entrepreneur, and willing to relocate anywhere. We chatted away exchanging the requisite initial information and he told me I was quirky, but I assured him everyone was- or so I thought. After a few minutes GA man informed me that he had been sitting all day and was tired of typing. Just call me he wrote and sent me a phone number. Without even knowing his name I figured why not- always with my readers in mind. Perhaps this might make an interesting story I thought.

"So what exactly do you do?" I inquired after he told me early on in the conversation that if we got to like each other coming many states away would be no problem at all as he could come and go and was more than willing at a moments notice. Perhaps that was the first sign of problems.

"I set up websites and let them just make me money while I do nothing. I'm so sick of meeting girls who are focused on their work and always busy. I flew to NY recently to meet this woman and I had to actually wait for her to get out of work before we could hang out. Ridiculous I know. I can't be held down with some kind of 9-5 job. These woman their whole life is about work they wake up and think about it, put make-up on for it, go to it, bring it home. It's out of control" he lamented

"So what kind of websites are these?" I asked nervously already writing him off but thinking I should be polite

"Well If I tell you you might be weirded out <you think> I mean it's not like I practice every single thing I do. I promised myself I wouldn't tell anyone but you sound like an honest intelligent person ok fine I'll show you the site"

"Is this something my work computer is going to block"

"No, no nothing like that. I sell products and expert advice on a pure eating lifestyle. Are you into organic food?"

"I buy it sometimes but I wouldn't say it's all I eat" As I clicked on the website I came across all of this odd information on pure diets and raw food, and a whole page with pictures of many of my favorites (popcorn, chocolate, wine) saying click here if you're addicted to these foods. Luckily my work laptop blocked the sites as I am sure I didn't want to see what was beyond the little click here words.

"You see because my body's enzymes are balanced, I don't need to indulge in any of this negative food. I don't drink any alcohol, eat any junk good, eat any meat."

"But, what's left?" I inquired. "No alcohol? Not even wine" I was in shock. My wine bottles quivered from within the fridge nearby. I could feel their pain.

"Listen, if you give me a month, forget it three weeks I could make it so you don't ever even need wine, you're body will have the balanced nourishment it needs."

"I don't need it, I drink it to enhance the flavor of my food"

"Your body wouldn't even accept it anymore. It is crying out for the purity of raw and indigenous foods."

"I'm not giving up wine, but I'm not certain I follow what exactly you do eat"

"Like I said I don't follow every single thing on my site, I mean some people take it to an extreme You know those little bugs on the lettuce when you bring it home?"

"No!" and really I didn't have the faintest clue what he was talking about. I mean rarely is lettuce one of the many veggies I buy but if I do I haven't seen any little critters scampering a long it.

"Some suggest that eating these bugs maintains the inner organic nature of your systems"

"Hmmm, very interesting" I muttered now feeling very alarmed. In the background I could hear a lot of noise and inquired if he was outside

"Yes, of course I'm jumping on my trampoline. It balances the nodules in my head. I don't need to formally exercise or indulge in any toxins because jumping creates a mental peace and clarity. I told you I was quirky. At this point I knew a fabulous story to post was brewing so I continued probing.

"So these businesses of yours keep your financially stable enough never to have to work another job? Do you own a place?"

"Ok well that's a long story. I could have a place if I wanted to but right now because of an adverse turn of events I am living with family . My brother and I inherited a large sum of money when my grandfather passed away and we gave it to my father to invest and he lost it all, so since I am ready to go anywhere at any time I just don't see a point in getting a place, although obviously I could. Have you ever heard of mud huts? I've always wanted to live in one. Don't you? It's just this wonderful structure that's completely natural!"

"Ummm no I actually don't want to live in one. I'm not quite sure they'd fit in where I live

"So tell me about your job. Are you another one of those 9-5 woman"

"Well I actually love my job and enjoy working"

"Surely though when you have kids you won't work right? I mean my mother obviously stopped working when she had kids, and my aunt and you know female cousins they don't work. They make themselves available in case their husbands want to do something fun."

"I don't have any plans not to work. I think it teaches kids responsibility, and besides I have professional goals"

"You goal should be to get away from all that ridiculousness and be able to jump all day if you want or gather materials to build a hut. That's the life you know you want, you could have it to with me.

"As overly appealing as that sounds, I'm positive that's not something I have any interest in but I do wish you the best of luck" It was time to get back to reality, emails, cell phones, walls made of sheet rock. As I hung up the phone I pondered that never in my life was I more geographically comfortable. This quirky jerk drank no wine, ate no chocolate, and jumped around feeling good after eating bugs, complaining that woman worked.

Sometimes more and more, it feels damn good to be single.

FLASHBACK: Jack-O-Latern out of season, with good reason.

Good Evening All,

Sorry to disappoint but there's no news from Elevator Man. He was out all AM, and in meetings until the afternoon when he left early. Maybe the wife needed him at home? Anyway no communication. However I did rope my co worker into a covert operation to the area we thought he might sit in so we could try and stake out his office this AM while he was out and look for family photos. The mission was aborted after proving unsuccessful so the mystery continues. Not to worry, I'll be back at the office on Thursday eagerly soaking up the cool air that's being provided on my company's dime! Chatted with Almost MBA for a bit tonight but we got cut off and I didn't realize until a few minutes ago he had called right back so I figured it might be too late to call. Will try and touch base tomorrow....Also got a number emailed to me today from a new frog, he's a young one from the next state over. Three years my junior. Asked me to give him a call. Does that count as robbing the cradle?

So since I have no new elevator news thought I'd share a tale of online non bliss, and no kiss from the past. This all went down about 7 or 8 years ago so quite sometime. When I was newly single after my high school into college though it should have been called off in high school relationship came to a lilting end. I decided to explore the world of Internet dating. Ahhhh so much fun and so many more frogs in far proximity that had no idea the restaurant I said was great in the area was the most expensive one I couldn't ever get anyone local to take me too (sans the high school ex). Just think in all these instances no one ever asked for their money back...

Shortly after I posted my profile, I got an email from a guy, senator wannabe and we exchanged photos, chatted by phone and made plans to meet. Senator wannabe was a little shorter then what I was looking for, at 5’10, but he seemed cute in the picture, and was very ambitious. After changing the plans a few times we agreed to meet at the mall, my fathers sanctioned public locale in case the guy was an evil rapist. My sister who was in high school, and also under 100lbs and my father appointed body guard of choice was busy that night so I went at it solo. When I got to the mall I called his cell phone from mine and was talking to him until we saw each other and hung up. It looked like a scene from “Clueless” as we flipped our phones down and walked towards each other. Hey this was barely 2000 so forgive the old school chick flick reference please.

The first thing I noticed was that he was a few inches at least, shorter then he claimed to be. He couldn’t possibly have been taller then 5’7” and he didn’t look that much like his picture. This, as time went on I would learn was a running theme in Internet dating. We decided to eat at the the mall (not sure how I missed out on the pricey restaurant here) and the conversation flowed pretty well. Senator wannabe was from a wealthy town about an hour away and wanted to spend most of the time talking about his time on a political campaign and all of the people whom his father knew. He was clearly stuck-up, but for my father sake I tried to give him a chance. After all he was ahhh yes one of the Chosen People!

Upon the conclusion of the rather uneventful, but highly bragging dinner, in the same format that all of the other dates had taken, we headed back to my parents house. My father liked to assess everyone. My parents got into this big conversation on the town they used to live in with senator wannabe and I was so bored I considered calling up a friend to chat. As I often did in life, I wondered if my parents would ever leave the room. The conversation soon morphed into the fact that the guy had been recently voted into the Board of Education in his town and he was telling my father about the propaganda he had distributed during his campaign. After he had told my parents that he knew the state senator about 17 times, I had already counted how many family pictures adorned our living room, and noticed several spots of discoloration on the ceiling.

We finally decided to go upstairs because when he looked at his watch he realized that “Law and Order” was on and asked if I minded if he watched it. I had never seen the show before but was enjoying it a lot since it was certainly more enticing than conversing with him. This was until I bit into a Godiva Truffle (my usual choice snack) and half of my front tooth flew out of my mouth. Ok maybe it was really bonding but I still looked like a Jack O Lantern. I wasn’t in that much pain but I was certainly embarrassed as I scurried out of the room to call my dentist at home who luckily agreed see me the next morning. Actually my conversation with her was much more interesting than senator wannabe or "Law and Order" but alas I had to return back to the room where the bonding lay.

Soon after the tooth incident, senator wannabe had to head out (hmm I wonder why) so as I walked him to the door, with my hand covering my mouth, I knew I had more then a perfect excuse not to kiss him goodnight. Although I was unhappy that I looked like I had been punched in the mouth, it was a blessing in disguise because I avoided a kiss, citing irrevocable tooth pain, and happily closed the door behind him. He instant messaged me frequently after the date and asked me out to dinner several times, but I declined because I didn’t want him to get the idea I was interested. My tooth was fixed though and turned out immaculate thanks to the work of my amazing dentist, to whom I was a very frequent visitor (and still am) , as a result of my fixation on Godiva chocolate. With a brand new filling and a perfect smile I was ready to meet the next guy, in my string of online suitors.

Hope you all enjoyed a little glimpse of frogs, the early version! Hopefully tomorrow updates will ensue.

Nite All!

The best weight for the least strokes

Good Evening All My Loyal Readers,
I so apologize for not posting in so long. Life has been busy and the frogs have been in the pond and not on the lilly pads lately. I do have a very very special treat, which took a long time to prepare for all of you....I'll get to that in a moment. For those of your wondering about fratboy1 he disappeared and I didn't hear from him after beach day for a whole week. Now while I didn't care that much I kinda wondered what the deal was as I'm a closure type girl. I called him up a week after the beach day and he called right back and gave me what I expected the general work is busy blah blah story which was fine I just was making sure he was alive. That was So two weeks ago. Anyway he tell me that he's so busy that week and that he knows how to get in touch but I won't hear from him that week, so the next day I get a facebook message from him saying thankis so much for leaving a message to see how he was. Meanwhile I didn't even leave a message. Perhaps he's bipolar? I'm going to run with that for now. I thought he was too busy to write and there was the message less then 24 hours after the call. So strange but then again we don't call them frogs for nothing. Other then that I had another chat with Almost MBA, just chatting so far no plans to meet so I can't report anything all too interesting on him.

I did in other news...don't worry we're almost at the main event here get an email from one of my crazy mothers friends tonight saying that she was very impressed with me and wondered if she might give my number, which she didn't have to her friends son. "It's never bad to meet someone new, well almost never" she said. No info whatsoever on who this guy is. Now the woman is very nice, and rich from what I can recall (wonder if her friend with the son is too). A rich frog is better then a poor frog. I'd say they wouldn't ask for their money back from dinner but we had that myth broken with oral surgeon. Anyway I wrote back and asked how old/ where from. We'll see if that can develop into a new story. Since it's not my mother directly I'm guessing he won't be another hedonist. Maybe a masochist? It could get very interesting.

And now for the delight you've all been waiting for, after last weeks absence and no meeting with elevator man (he's been swamped with meetings with his promotion) tonight we had our very first IM conversation. I figured he seems to be the crowd favorite so yes, I initiated it and he seemed quite happy to oblige. And so folks just for you I've taken the time to delete our real names our of the conversation and then since this program can't support multiple fonts, label line by line who said what....here it is, exactly as it was. Aren't you curious to see what tomorrow may bring? And yes, I promise if there's contact tomorrow I'll definately keep you all posted.

Until tomorrow -



Me [4:59 PM]Hi
Him [4:59 PM]:hey there!
Me [4:59 PM]:How's it going?
Me [5:00 PM]:
sorry connection messed up
Him [5:00 PM]:
going ok, but crazy as usual. u? are you in today?
Me [5:01 PM]:
nope i am home and it's scorching! will be in tomorrow
Him [5:05 PM]:
hope you have ac??
Him [5:06 PM]:
I have my team in town tomorrow, but maybe I can bug you if you are around
Me [5:06 PM]:
ahh your team that sounds so fancy haha
Me [5:07 PM]:
you can bug me if you want, are you going to walk?
Him [5:07 PM]:
i know huh?
Me [5:07 PM]:
yea i have the AC on
Him[5:07 PM]:
walk??? do you want to see me have a heat stroke? lol
Him [5:08 PM]:
and you need to watch out for sunburns...you have already reached your annual quota
Me [5:08 PM]:
you're prob right, I am still peeling a little it's ridiculous i meant inside though
Him [5:09 PM]:
sure, if its a walk to get water and coffee! do you do laps down on the first floor?
Me [5:09 PM]:
wherever i am not picky
Me [5:09 PM]:
that sounds like a good plan, I am always checking to see if the store has passion tea that's my absolute fav starbucks item have you had it?
Him [5:10 PM]:
no, but I'll try it on your recomendation!
Me [5:10 PM]:
its the best ever
Me [5:10 PM]:
it tastes like passion fruit with an aftertaste of cinnamon
Me [5:11 PM]:
i can;t really explain it you have to experience it for yourself
Him [5:12 PM]:
all that flavor in tea? you seem to have good taste, so i'll try it
Him [5:12 PM]:
well.....maybe not in movies.....too many chick flicks, lol
Me [5:12 PM]:
thanks I'm good with wine and ice tea
Me [5:12 PM]:
what you're the one who said you've watched several recently
Me [5:13 PM]:
what;s your excuse I've been watching mature foreign films
Him [5:13 PM]:
yeah, but you are not supposed to bring that up!
Me [5:13 PM]:
don't worry the IM reading people went home for the night no one will ever know
Him [5:13 PM]:
i'm too busy watching silly waste of time movies
Him [5:13 PM]:
thank god!
Me [5:13 PM]:
so whats your fav chick flick of the week?
Him [5:13 PM]:
hmmmmmm
Me [5:14 PM]:
are you like a closet fan?
Him [5:14 PM]:
nah...but I have seem some
Him [5:14 PM]:
i'm thinking...
Him [5:15 PM]:
geeze...I guess I really don't like chick movies, I can't remember any!
Me [5:15 PM]:
i'm not sure i believe this
Me [5:15 PM]:
sounds like you pick quite a few for viewing
Him [5:15 PM]:
but I did just watch children on men on HBO, and that was a good movie...you see?
Him [5:15 PM]:
shhhh!!!
Me [5:15 PM]:
no HBO
Him [5:15 PM]:
don't tell on me!
Me [5:15 PM]:
i'm telling you i won't say a word to your team not to worry
Me [5:15 PM]:
they may lost some respect
Him [5:15 PM]:
nah, they have already lost that
Him [5:16 PM]:
or never had!
Me [5:16 PM]:
I actually don't watch that much TV would rather be out and about or reading
Me [5:16 PM]:
this soon isn't it a relatively new team?
Me [5:16 PM]:
you may need to take them to the movies to regain (but let them pick)
Him [5:16 PM]:
well, children on men had "4 stars" on the TV. I think you couyld rent
Me [5:16 PM]:
maybe i will have to check it out
Him [5:17 PM]:
it takes place in europe (interested??) in like 2050 and has to do with the entire world going into anarchy because people have become unable to have children, and the youngest person on earth is like 20 years old
Him [5:18 PM]:
its kinda dark, but I liked it
Me [5:18 PM]:
that actually does sound really interesting
Me [5:18 PM]:
i saw then she found her with helen hunt the other day think i mentioned and that was a little dark but good (and in english)
Him [5:19 PM]:
well, I kinda like movies that are a little dark, and make you feel different after you are done watching. If you can handle a little vilence (not gore) then you might like that movie
Me [5:19 PM]:
a little violence not into a super lot, the premise sounds very unique though
Me [5:19 PM]:
did you see minority report with Tom cruise?
Him [5:19 PM]:
yeah, I liked that
Me [5:20 PM]:
that was a cool futuristic film
Me [5:20 PM]:
atonement was really good too saw that a few months ago
Him [5:20 PM]:
in this one, you can't tell its the future...it actually looks just like today, probably because the world just stopped progressing when this happens
Him [5:20 PM]:
i didn't see atonement...what was it about?
Me [5:20 PM]:
interesting, you have to hand it to the people who dreams up these new concepts
Me [5:21 PM]:
based on a book i
Me [5:21 PM]:
Fledgling writer Briony Tallis, as a 13-year-old, irrevocably changes the course of several lives when she accuses her older sister's lover of a crime he did not commit.
Me [5:21 PM]:
British film
Him [5:21 PM]:
ok cool..I might try that one
Me [5:22 PM]:
i didn't actually write that little line about it haha
Him [5:22 PM]:
you won't accuse me of being a chick flick lover, will you?
Him [5:22 PM]:
could have fooled me!
Me [5:22 PM]:
i might actually I am still wondering why u keep watching them if you "claim" you don't like that
Me [5:22 PM]:
thanks i shouldn't have admitted it
Him [5:23 PM]:
I have to invest time to try and understand what women think!!
Him [5:23 PM]:
don't you dare!!!
Me [5:23 PM]:
hahah
Me [5:23 PM]:
what about woman's thinking has you most confused?
Him [5:23 PM]:
why they like chick flicks
Me [5:23 PM]:
this plagues you enough to invest your valuable time in watching them
Me [5:24 PM]:
hmm something just is not adding up
Him [5:24 PM]:
...and why do they always have the scene where they are all dancing and singing along to an oldie song
Him [5:24 PM]:
...not that I've ever seen one
Me [5:24 PM]:
that actually doesn't happen when woman get together that often
Me [5:24 PM]:
you must watch them nightly
Him [5:24 PM]:
shoot...I thought that was real?
Me [5:24 PM]:
i think the chick flicks themselves may have you confused
Him [5:25 PM]:
that could be my problem
Him [5:25 PM]:
among many others! lol
Me [5:25 PM]:
such as?
Me [5:26 PM]:
denial of love of chick flicks?
Him [5:27 PM]:
yes, and a love of junk food
Me [5:27 PM]:
hmm thats a common vice
Him [5:27 PM]:
yep
Me [5:27 PM]:
what's your favorite poisen?
Him [5:28 PM]:
well...its might sound gross, and its really not "junk" but I love cheese.
Him [5:28 PM]:
I could kill a pound of it was some bread or crackers
Me [5:28 PM]:
its actually funny, cause i don't eat cheese , people always freak out when they hear that
Me [5:28 PM]:
I feel like hey there's more for everyone else so who cares
Him [5:28 PM]:
THE HORROR!

Him [5:29 PM]:
That’s right, I can trust you not to steal mine!
Him [5:29 PM]:
more for me!
Me [5:29 PM]:
see that's what I am saying
Me [5:29 PM]:
mine is chocolate
Him [5:29 PM]:
well, that’s a problem, b/c I love that too
Me [5:29 PM]:
i suppose i shouldn't tell you aout all the various snacks i keep in my desk at work
Him [5:29 PM]:
what is your fav kind?
Me [5:29 PM]:
Godiva
Me [5:29 PM]:
def better then lindt
Me [5:29 PM]:
u?
Him [5:29 PM]:
i'm already looking up where you sit, lol

Me [5:30 PM]:
damn and I didn't even lock my snack drawer
Him [5:30 PM]:
I like regular Hersheys, but love the good stuff for a treat sometimes
Him [5:30 PM]:
wait....ill be right back
Me [5:30 PM]:
have you ever had the symphony bar with almonds and toffee chips thats my fav drugstore chocolate
Me [5:30 PM]:
oh goodness
Him [5:30 PM]:
thats good stuff!
Me [5:30 PM]:
love that one
Him [5:31 PM]:
but I'd have to eat about 4 of them
Me [5:31 PM]:
you know those jumbo size ones
Me [5:31 PM]:
like the ones that are a few bucks
Him [5:31 PM]:
That’s more like it
Me [5:31 PM]:
When I was in high school this guy had a dozen of them sent to the job I had at the mall
Him [5:32 PM]:
nice guy!
Me [5:32 PM]:
i used to freeze them
Me [5:32 PM]:
i had them for months it was so much chocolate
Him [5:32 PM]:
i'm not that nice..I'd buy them, but then I'd eat most of them, and send you 2 or 3
Me [5:32 PM]:
haha
Me [5:33 PM]:
maybe if you watched more chick flicks you'd be nicer?
Me [5:33 PM]:
i guess 2 or 3 is better then nothing right
Him [5:33 PM]:
good point...or at least I'd break out into song sometimes when an oldie came on the radio
Me [5:33 PM]:
excellent i look forward to hearing that on the 5th floor tomorrow
Him [5:34 PM]:
and dance with my friends in a way that seems spontanius, but strangley seems rehearsed
Me [5:34 PM]:
I think girls just want to have fun would be a great warm up
Me [5:34 PM]:
hahah you must seriously watch one a night!
Him [5:34 PM]:
nah....is that an oldie?
Me [5:34 PM]:
this is shocking
Me [5:34 PM]:
it's from the 80s so it's old to me
Me [5:34 PM]:
haha
Him [5:34 PM]:
lol
Him [5:34 PM]:
now I feel old
Me [5:34 PM]:
me 2
Me [5:34 PM]:
i wish i hadn't have said that
Me [5:34 PM]:
next topic
Him [5:35 PM]:
lol...I'm literally sitting here in my office laughing my butt off
Him [5:35 PM]:
too funny (young lady)
Me [5:35 PM]:
excellent glad i'm providing entertainment
Me [5:35 PM]:
young lady sounds like such a disciplinary term
Me [5:35 PM]:
i feel like i'm being scolded haha
Him [5:35 PM]:
well, behave yourself then

Me I'm trying

Him [5:35 PM]:
respect your elders
Me [5:36 PM]:
generally i;m good at that
Him [5:36 PM]:
lol...i'm still dying here
Me [5:36 PM]:
i was just trying to help you find a song for your new routine
Me [5:36 PM]:
excellent, glad to see i've still got the comedic talent
Me [5:36 PM]:
next stop costume dept
Him [5:36 PM]:
how about REALLY old, like the police?
Me [5:37 PM]:
i'll be watching you every breath you take
Me [5:37 PM]:
isn't that their song
Him [5:37 PM]:
lol
Me [5:37 PM]:
you can sing that to my snack drawer
Me [5:37 PM]:
haha
Him [5:37 PM]:
yeah, but written before you were born
Me [5:37 PM]:
you don;t know when i was born
Him [5:37 PM]:
yes I do
Me [5:37 PM]:
how?
Him [5:37 PM]:
i'm smart!
Me [5:37 PM]:
did you hear it on a chick flick?
Him [5:37 PM]:
yes!!!
Me [5:38 PM]:
excellent i was up for best supporting actress in that one- award always goes to the one whose name they recognize
Me [5:38 PM]:
gets me every time
Him [5:38 PM]:
oh yeah? you have a recongnizable name
Me [5:39 PM]:
i meant the actress who beat me
Him [5:39 PM]:
who?
Me [5:39 PM]:
in the chick flick which revelaed my age to you
Me [5:39 PM]:
follow along here
Him [5:39 PM]:
yes
Me [5:39 PM]:
i can't work if you can't keep up
Him [5:39 PM]:
and laughing still
Me [5:39 PM]:
ok now we're b ack on then
Me [5:39 PM]:
so what year was I born you were telling me again...
Him [5:39 PM]:
oh yeah
Him [5:39 PM]:
1984
Me [5:40 PM]:
wow
Him [5:40 PM]:
drum roll
Him [5:40 PM]:
well? do I win?
Me [5:40 PM]:
were you playing that film in cantonese?
Him [5:40 PM]:
lol
Me [5:40 PM]:
cause i think you're a little confused
Me [5:40 PM]:
you may need to watch it awake next time
Him [5:40 PM]:
ok...do I get 2 more guesses?
Him [5:40 PM]:
maybe it was the language barrioe
Him [5:40 PM]:
barrior
Me [5:40 PM]:
sure, i;m feeling generous
Me [5:41 PM]:
i'm thinking so, i would highly recommend closed captioning for all your tv translation needs
Him [5:41 PM]:
lol
Him [5:41 PM]:
ok...ready...
Him [5:41 PM]:
19
Me [5:41 PM]:
always
Him [5:41 PM]:
is that part right?
Him [5:41 PM]:
82
Me [5:41 PM]:
i'm not 19 i can tell you that
Me [5:41 PM]:
nope
Me [5:41 PM]:
one more guess
Me [5:41 PM]:
and if you get it wrong you don't win the prize
Him [5:42 PM]:
see...I think you are way younger than me, and I'm worried about going into the 70's
Him [5:42 PM]:
I think that’s the wrong direction
Him [5:42 PM]:
so I'm gonna stop guessing
Him [5:42 PM]:
I think it might be 1985
Him [5:42 PM]:
crap...I just guessed again
Me [5:42 PM]:
wow i guess i'm flattered
Me [5:42 PM]:
you're not good with this game
Me [5:42 PM]:
nope 1980
Me [5:43 PM]:
you were right about not dipping back into the 70s
Me [5:43 PM]:
you can have that decade
Him [5:43 PM]:
thats mine
Me [5:43 PM]:
1972
Him [5:43 PM]:
very very very close
Me [5:43 PM]:
3?
Him [5:43 PM]:
yep!
Me [5:43 PM]:
i knew it
Me [5:44 PM]:
i won!
Him [5:44 PM]:
shoot!!
Me [5:44 PM]:
better stock up on chocolate
Him [5:44 PM]:
now I'm really gonna raid your candy drawer
Him [5:44 PM]:
i'm a sore loser
Me [5:44 PM]:
oo thats not good
Me [5:44 PM]:
cause I always win
Him [5:44 PM]:
i can tell...you are smarter than me
Me [5:44 PM]:
you're the one with the team
Me [5:44 PM]:
i'm not sure about that
Him [5:44 PM]:
"the team"?
Me [5:45 PM]:
i win in scrabble, mini-golf, and poker
Him [5:45 PM]:
i'm just older
Me [5:45 PM]:
that we have established haha
Me [5:45 PM]:
those are my games
Him [5:45 PM]:
you will never win in mini golf
Him [5:45 PM]:
you are crazy to boast of such a thing
Me [5:45 PM]:
that sounds like a really cocky statement for a sore loser
Him [5:45 PM]:
well, I didn't know that mini golf was up for grabs
Him [5:45 PM]:
I never would have played the DOB game
Me [5:46 PM]:
i have just one thing to say in the words of one of your favorite chick flicks i'm sure "bring it on!"
Him [5:46 PM]:
lol!
Him [5:46 PM]:
they don't say that
Him [5:46 PM]:
.....not that I ever watched one
Me [5:46 PM]:
of course they do haven't you seen that
Me [5:46 PM]:
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0204946/
Me [5:46 PM]:
its about crazy cheerleaders
Him [5:46 PM]:
nope...too bust watching tough movies, like 300
Me [5:47 PM]:
yea doubtful
Him [5:47 PM]:
oh yeah, I saw part of that one
Me [5:47 PM]:
i'll bet you did
Me [5:47 PM]:
that is no surprise!
Him [5:47 PM]:
hey, i'm actually going to go to the gym now, what do you think about that?
Me [5:47 PM]:
i don't believe it for a moment
Him [5:47 PM]:
gonna start training hard for mini-golf
Me [5:47 PM]:
i thought you were in gm avoidance mode
Him [5:48 PM]:
not now I'm not
Me [5:48 PM]:
sometimes practice doesn't make perfect
Me [5:48 PM]:
it's innate skill
Him [5:48 PM]:
nope
Him [5:48 PM]:
its determination and grit
Him [5:48 PM]:
than make the mini golf player
Me [5:48 PM]:
I'm still not intimidated
Me [5:48 PM]:
put your $$ where your mouth is
Him [5:48 PM]:
have you seen how much bigger than you I am?
Him [5:48 PM]:
how could I not be good at mini golf?
Me [5:49 PM]:
you don;t have to be big to pick up a little golf club
Me [5:49 PM]:
its not like shot put
Him [5:49 PM]:
its mini, and I weight like 230 lbs!!
Me [5:49 PM]:
there's no wrestling involved
Him [5:49 PM]:
lol
Me [5:49 PM]:
what does weight have to do with it
Him [5:49 PM]:
gives my shot way more stability
Me [5:49 PM]:
i may be small but i have a very sharp kick
Him [5:49 PM]:
i can tell
Me [5:50 PM]:
my shot is highly stablized
Me [5:50 PM]:
and precise
Me [5:50 PM]:
they call me mrs tiger wood
Him [5:50 PM]:
from a lower center of gravity? i'm skeptical
Me [5:50 PM]:
you shouldn't be, just be in fear
Me [5:50 PM]:
i will bring tissues so you can use them to blot your tears
Him [5:50 PM]:
we will see
Me [5:50 PM]:
my treat
Me [5:51 PM]:
do you prefer kleenex?
Him [5:51 PM]:
oh , now I have to step up and face the challenge?
Him [5:51 PM]:
puffs plus lotion please
Him [5:51 PM]:
I have sensitive slin
Him [5:51 PM]:
skin
Me [5:51 PM]:
that sounds SO chick flick loveresque
Him [5:51 PM]:
i'm all out from my last film
Me [5:51 PM]:
i'll be sure to pick them up along with my own blue ribbon
Him [5:52 PM]:
lol
Me [5:52 PM]:
a lot of laughing going on
Him [5:52 PM]:
I huge blue ribbon, right?
Me [5:52 PM]:
well i have to make it eight weight proportinate right?
Me [5:52 PM]:
since i don't make the same mini golf weight class as you
Him [5:53 PM]:
yeah, make sure its big enough. just because it looks good on you, doesn't mean that people will be able to see it when I'm wearing it
Me [5:53 PM]:
ok now you've crossed a line, ribbon theft is not something aetna looks upon lightly
Him [5:53 PM]:
oh I won't have to steal it
Me [5:53 PM]:
i may be announcing my victory to your team
Me [5:53 PM]:
trust me you will
Me [5:53 PM]:
i may start locking my drawers now
Him [5:53 PM]:
how dare you! !!
Him [5:53 PM]:
me too
Me [5:54 PM]:
i think you're all talk
Him [5:54 PM]:
too late, i already have a chocolate mustache compliments of your stash
Me [5:54 PM]:
thats ironic since i've only got pretzal goldfish left
Me [5:54 PM]:
and you're out of tissues this is NOT a good sign
Him [5:54 PM]:
I mean a pretzal goldfish-stash
Me [5:55 PM]:
yea yea yea see all talk ,and no ability for action
Me [5:55 PM]:
guess that weight isn't pulling much weight now
Him [5:55 PM]:
oh yeah? your lucky we don't have a mini golf course here
Him [5:55 PM]:
i'd block 60 minutes to take care of business tomorrow
Me [5:55 PM]:
if we did you'd just be like oh it's too hot or something
Me [5:55 PM]:
excuses excuses
Me [5:56 PM]:
i'll bring my putter
Him [5:56 PM]:
no, my special "mini golf outfit" is very cool. its made of the highest quality material
Me [5:56 PM]:
silk?
Him [5:56 PM]:
NO!!
Him [5:56 PM]:
not that high quality
Him [5:57 PM]:
who do you think I am, hugh heffner?
Me [5:57 PM]:
oh i thought guys who watched chick flicks only wore silk
Him [5:57 PM]:
hey, I get cold sometimes!
Me [5:57 PM]:
nah hes not that weighty
Me [5:57 PM]:
is he?
Me [5:57 PM]:
yuck
Him [5:57 PM]:
nope
Me [5:57 PM]:
and you're not that old
Him [5:57 PM]:
nope
Me [5:57 PM]:
hugh isn't a sore loser
Him [5:57 PM]:
almost though....jeeze compared to you, its like I'm a grandpa
Me [5:57 PM]:
he has so many back up plans
Him [5:57 PM]:
true!
Me [5:58 PM]:
oh please, just consider yourself seasoned
Me [5:58 PM]:
i mean in age not golf
Me [5:58 PM]:
or agility
Him [5:58 PM]:
i've had SOOOOO many more years of practice
Me [5:58 PM]:
and you still keep losing
Me [5:58 PM]:
i feel kinda bad for u
Me [5:58 PM]:
are you going to be ok
Him [5:58 PM]:
I might have to stretch first, but so what?
Him [5:58 PM]:
yes, I'm fine when I win
Me [5:58 PM]:
which is ummmm.NEVER?
Him [5:59 PM]:
lol
Me [5:59 PM]:
for me
Him [5:59 PM]:
put it this way, I've never lost to anyone who was born in the 80's
Me [5:59 PM]:
well tomorrow's a new day
Me [5:59 PM]:
must be my purpose in life
Me [5:59 PM]:
hopefully tissues are buy one get one free
Him [5:59 PM]:
shoot...they just turned the lights off on me!
Him [6:00 PM]:
yeah? I won't need them
Me [6:00 PM]:
the chick flicks about to begin....
Me [6:00 PM]:
this one won't have a happy ending for u
Him [6:00 PM]:
my private screening?
Me [6:00 PM]:
i guess it seems that way
Him [6:00 PM]:
you are killing me
Me [6:00 PM]:
is that a bad thing?
Him [6:00 PM]:
you know I'm gonna talk trash to you all the time now, right?
Me [6:00 PM]:
amazing this young, and this funny!
Him [6:01 PM]:
b/c you are making me laugh so much
Me [6:01 PM]:
I can take it like I'm 230 lbs any day
Him [6:01 PM]:
no way
Me [6:01 PM]:
i think that just makes me funny
Me [6:01 PM]:
way
Him [6:01 PM]:
you could never keep up with my combination of speed and power...esp not in mini golf
Me [6:01 PM]:
try me
Him [6:02 PM]:
well young lady, I have to hit the gym now
Me [6:02 PM]:
you're the one who self admittedly said you are out of shape
Him [6:02 PM]:
you have inspired me
Me [6:02 PM]:
excellent
Me [6:02 PM]:
i will also beat you
Me [6:02 PM]:
but that’s for another day
Him [6:02 PM]:
well, out of shape is relative
Me [6:02 PM]:
i think i'll get ready for dinner since i could stand to gain a few lbs i guess
Him [6:02 PM]:
i;m not in mini golf shape
Me [6:03 PM]:
what exactly is mini golf shape
Him [6:03 PM]:
you better bulk up
Me [6:03 PM]:
i have some pasta
Him [6:03 PM]:
and now performance enhancing
Him [6:03 PM]:
no..
Me [6:03 PM]:
that doesn't sound very flattering
Me [6:03 PM]:
lol
Him [6:03 PM]:
hah
Him [6:03 PM]:
you know what I meant
Me [6:03 PM]:
i don't have all night to counsel you on all your issues
Me [6:03 PM]:
one at a time please
Him [6:03 PM]:
lol
Him [6:04 PM]:
i'm just saying you could be randomly tested before and after the match
Me [6:04 PM]:
i'd still win
Him [6:04 PM]:
randomly...yikes, I'm going down hill!

Him [6:05 PM]:
thats you handing me the winners cake
Me [6:05 PM]:
excellent i can't wait for my cake
Him [6:05 PM]:
that you are going to make
Me [6:05 PM]:
no cheesecake
Me [6:05 PM]:
sorry
Me [6:05 PM]:
i prefer a chocolate raspberry torte
Him [6:05 PM]:
i love that
Me [6:05 PM]:
i'll lend you my apron
Him [6:05 PM]:
wouldn't fit me
Me [6:05 PM]:
excellent you can treat me after i beat you
Me [6:05 PM]:
that's true
Him [6:06 PM]:
it would be like a napkin
Me [6:06 PM]:
i'll sew two together, maybe three
Him [6:06 PM]:
better...
Me[6:06 PM]:
at least it's silk
Him [6:06 PM]:
good, it will make my movie viewing outfit
Me [6:06 PM]:
i think you're all set
Me [6:06 PM]:
make sure it's a flourless torte please they're richer
Me [6:06 PM]:
oh and bring one of those
Him [6:06 PM]:
stop making me laugh! people are gonna think im crazy(er)
Me [6:07 PM]:
the () part was the most accurate you typed
Me [6:07 PM]:
i can't help it 99 lbs of pure humor
Him [6:07 PM]:
thats it...your on
Him [6:07 PM]:
lot of humor in that little body of yours!
Me [6:07 PM]:
name the time and the place
Me [6:07 PM]:
and i'll go and buy the tissues
Me [6:07 PM]:
i'm thinking i should buy in bulk

Him [6:08 PM]:
remember, puffs plus
Me [6:08 PM]:
with lotion right
Me [6:08 PM]:
i pay attention
Him [6:08 PM]:
yes
Me [6:08 PM]:
heavy on the brain cells light on the extra lbs
Him [6:08 PM]:
lol
Him [6:08 PM]:
I'll give you that
Me [6:09 PM]:
excellent
Him [6:09 PM]:
alright, I look forward to sparring with you tomorrow
Me [6:09 PM]:
no olives in my martini
Me [6:09 PM]:
sounds like a plan
Him [6:09 PM]:
lets do it early, I get tired after 6:00...
Him [6:09 PM]:
my advanced age and all
Me [6:09 PM]:
old man you are
Me [6:09 PM]:
ok well you contact me when ready
Him [6:09 PM]:
i will!
Him [6:10 PM]:
have a great night, thanks for making me laugh
Me [6:10 PM]:
good luck at the gym
Him [6:10 PM]:
thanks
Me [6:10 PM]:
thanks u 2
Me [6:10 PM]:
don't burn yourself out
Him [6:10 PM]:
good luck bulking up
Me [6:10 PM]:
thanks
Me [6:11 PM]:
enjoy your evening
Him [6:11 PM]:
hah. her i'm going to hit the gym., and lift your tough 99.5 lbs over my head a dozen times
Him [6:11 PM]:
lol
Me [6:11 PM]:
that better not be a threat
Him [6:11 PM]:
i can't stop!!!!!
Me [6:11 PM]:
i bet you can only left 75 lbs
Me [6:11 PM]:
i can see that
Him [6:11 PM]:
oh yeah?
Me [6:11 PM]:
yea, i think as i said before all talk
Him [6:11 PM]:
no, I'm very private with my weights

Me: i will leave that intepretation to another day
Him [6:12 PM]:
lol
Him [6:12 PM]:
ok, have a great night
Me: u 2